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(Or, football fun for people who still have enough self-respect not to spend hours wondering whether to start Peerless Price or Ashley Lelie this week.)
UPDATED WITH REST OF SUNDAY SCHEDULE
Blah, blah, blah. I can live with an opening night split, especially knowing in my heart of hearts that if Culpepper doesn't throw that late interception, Miami would've taken the game. (And that, as LBR pointed out the other day, Pittsburgh would probably outpoint Baltimore in the syphilis competition if the Women of Steel City didn't so resemble the Men of Earth that STDs are nonexistent). But such is NFL football.
So anyway, here are Sunday picks:
Never thought I'd hear myself say this but I like the Rams getting 3.5 at home over the mighty, Super Bowl bound Denver Broncos. And, over 46.
For some inexplicable reason, I also really dig the Jets (+3) over Tennessee, but this won't be a high scoring Scrub Bowl, so under 36 is the way to go.
KINDA PICK OF THE WEEK ALERT: This isn't my favorite of all, but the Birds sure seem like free money this week, don't they? Christ, Houston doesn't even have a running back. And if David Carr thinks the last few seasons were painful, wait till he gets a load of the Eagles new D. They'll cover the 4.5 by the end of the first quarter and never look back. Still, it'll be under 37. A 24-9 type game.
Everything in my mind keeps saying, "Carolina and the over. Carolina and the over." But rivalry games are never, ever gimmes, especially in an unpredicable week one. So, Carolina (with an aching Steve Smith and a never-can-tell Jake Delhomme) and the over becomes a trap. As much as I think Michael Vick is Ran-dall reincarnate, Atlanta might not win the game, but they'll come within five in a low-scoring 14-10 type event (read: under).
Dallas getting 2.5 at Jacksonville? Take it. Take it. Take it. And 36.5 is too low.
I'm having a lot of trouble buying into this rejuvenated Arizona Cardinals thang, but San Francisco is bad. Like, knife-fighting in a subway wearing a black pleather jacket Bad. But seven and a half is a lot of points in the NFL. And seven and a half is a lot MORE points when the most inept franchise in the sport is laying them. Don't let it stop you. Arizona steamrolls the Niners, so much so that I like the under 42 points because a) San Fran will barely score and b) Kurt Warner doesn't have six TDs left in his God-fearing arm. 34-3 final.
I want to take Chicago so friggin bad here, so much so that I'll probably rue the day I typed this, but here goes nothing: It's probably Favre's last opener and, as much as he's washed up and over-rated, I gots me a feelin' he'll keep the Pack within 3.5 and that, to do so, the game'll go over 35.
You'd have to figure New England wants to send a message - we're back, bitches - to the league. But nine's a lot of points to give up in a rivalry game, no? Well, in this case, no is right, barely. This is a 10-point game, with the Pat's ending up on the right side of things. Now, will they get to 41 points. I don't think so; under.
I'm not sold on Chris Simms having a breakthrough season yet. And I'm not sold on Ray Lewis being overrated and washed up. Dude's still bad-ass. LOCK ALERT!!!! Though I'm torn on Tampa giving three at home (Go with them), I can't see anyway in hell this game goes over 24, let alone 34. And just like that, the over/under lock of the week is exposed.
But that leaves us with a spread pick of the week. And believe me, in the first week, there's no such thing as an easy one, but Reggie Bush and New Orleans aren't even going to need the three points that Cleveland, effin Cleveland is laying. (Game'll go over 36, too).
And finally, little bro's gonna take care of Horsehead Manning in New York, at least covering the 3.5 and helping the game go over 48.
Godspeed, degenerates.
Summer keeps me busy. Finally Malaysia! I'll get Vietnam and Cambodia up soon - as well as the World Basketball Championship Game.
The view from our hotel room â€" the very Petronas Towers that were robbed by Catherine Zeta-Jones and Sean Connery in “Entrapment”.
This was my second time to visit Malaysia, first time to Kuala Lumpur. Last year I was able to see some of the eastern side of mainland Malaysia as we traveled off the coast to its islands. The American stigma right now is putting a bit of a damper on world travel. Last year at times we felt like we had to be extra careful about what we said and even how we use our mannerisms. You can spot an American from a British or Australian or European rather easily. But there's always a chance he could be Canadian. That's why as an American traveler the smartest thing you can do is play the Canada card. Iron a Canadian flag patch on your backpack. The patch tells people, “I’m too nice for you to kill”. Here’s a conversation I had a one time on an Australian bus with a Yugoslavian-Aussie who’d fought in the Baltic war in the early 90s.
Yugo-Aussie: “Hello. Where are you from?”
Me: “America.”
Yugo-Aussie: “I hate Americans.”
Me: “Well…thanks.”
My friend: “I’m not American. I’m Canadian.”
Yugo-Aussie (with a big smile on his face): “Now you, I like!”
The patch saves lives. But for some reason I’ve never been a user. Malaysia is 70% Islamic and while 99% of Muslims are peace-loving great people, those few extremists worry me a bit. Last year while we were coming back from our island on a small tugboat, we sat by two Muslim ladies who spoke very little English, “Where from?” My friend Travis, not wanting to say we were from America looked at them smiling and replied, “Japan!” Which was true. They looked at each other and then at us in utter disgust as if to say, “If you’re going to lie, don't insult me by saying Japan, whitey!” About 5 minutes later, Peter, who’d been inside due to serious sunburn issues came and joined us, sitting between us and the Muslim ladies. The Muslim ladies looked at him and said, “Where from?” Peter smiled and replied, “Japan!” The puzzled looks on their faces may have made my trip.
This year we had a convenient layover in Kuala Lumpur on our way to Vietnam and Cambodia so we extended for a couple of days. Kuala Lumpur is a rather liberal and international city so I did feel pretty safe most of the time. However while walking around the central market in downtown I needed to use the restroom. I paid about a dime to go, and when I hand over money to use the restroom, no matter how little it is, I really would like to take advantage. Well, a very large bearded Malaysian dude I’ll call “Brutus” came in and stood at the neighboring urinal to me. For two very long minutes he stared at me 8 inches away from my face. It wasn’t a “Hey, how are ya big boy?” kinda stare. It was more of the standard “I’m going to smash your face in with a shovel” look. It probably goes without saying, but performance anxiety set in and I couldn’t go. I was disappointed because I wasted that dime. But more freaked out than anything because when I finally left he followed me. He waited as I washed my hands and followed me outside. I kept walking until I got to a crowd of people watching a few street musicians. He also stopped and pretended to watch the show while I backed up. I spotted a couple of friends walking near me who back tracked away with me. As soon as we tried to disappear, Brutus left the show and slowly walked away staring me down the whole time. I don’t remember another time when I was creeped out like that. There's really no great ending to that story, but for that I'm grateful, so thanks for indulging.
I'm obsessed with monkeys. Japan has monkeys supposedly, but I've had no luck seeing any. We visited the Batu Caves near Kuala Lumpur and there were so many monkeys eating bananas and peanuts. They get feisty if you want the food they stole from you back.
The entrance to the Batu Caves is following a trek up 272 famed stairs. Every year in February the Thaipusam Festival is held here. You may have seen this on National Geographic where many extreme Hindus pierce themselves before journeying up the religious stairway. I stole the picture below off the internet of a pierced man participating in the festival. Since we were there in August we didn't get to witness any of the craziness.
In the Caves
That's Chisato if you couldn't tell under her disguise.
Look in "My Pictures" under "New Pix!" for more.
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